Hot Dish: The MAN EATER Blog

The Perfect Hole, The Long John, and The Big O

February 8, 2010

Tags: Slump Buster, Puck, Recipe, Doughnuts, Breakfast, Pastries, Chocolate, Toffee, Candy

Man Eater has met her match.

Slump Buster not only broke the dry spell, he’s broken my orgasmic high score. I’ve had more Big O’s in 2010 than most women do during the entire span of their marriages. I don’t keep score, but if I did…I would’ve lost count (more…)

Red Hot Pop Secret

February 5, 2010

Tags: Valentine's Day, Holiday, Slump Buster, Fire Writer, Adultery, Books, Recipe, Snack, Popcorn, Red Hots, Cinnamon, Candy, Spicy

Valentine’s Day is coming. Slump Buster is going away. Man Eater is…cooking up trouble?

Let’s cut to the chase: Fire Writer is back in rotation. (Have I said “They always come back”? Because they DO!) Nothing’s happened…but the opportunity may soon present itself. Based on the ironic timing these (more…)

You Say "Potato", I say "Is This A Date?"

February 3, 2010

Tags: Dating, Lil Bro, Pumpkin Eater, My Little Indian, Puck, Slump Buster, Restaurants, PDA, TV, Television, Movies, Recipe, Pizza, Potatoes, Fries, Sweet Potato Fries, Spicy, Chipotle Mayo

What defines a date? Seriously. I want to know. ‘Cause somewhere along the line, I got labeled as “Couch Potato Chick”. After the requisite coffee, lunch, and dinner outings, we arrive at date three, have sex, and suddenly my suitors relegate me to “let’s stay in” status.

…not that I mind necessarily. Home (more…)

Sex? Yes! Sleepover? Um...

February 1, 2010

Tags: Slump Buster, Dating, Recipe, Panna Cotta, Berries, Dessert

Scene: a Saturday night. Slump Buster’s bed. Me spooning him. He’s drifted off. I’m still awake. His fingers are intertwined with mine and clasped, fist-like, on his chest. I can feel his heart beating. No matter how much his body shifts and twitches, his grip on my hand holds steady. Every (more…)

From a Very Bad Boy to a Berry Good Morning

January 29, 2010

Tags: Slump Buster, Jail Bird, EconMan, Shrink, Puck, Music, Books, Advice, Recipe, Pancakes, Blueberries, Blackberries, Fruit, Breakfast, Brunch

Was I too harsh in my last post? Blame it on my writing style. Third person plural can sound accusatory, so today I will stick to “I” statements. This is what was really going on inside my pretty little head:

At about 24 hours post slump-bust, the insecurity set in. A doom-and-gloom thought train thundered (more…)

Playing Your Cards Right

January 28, 2010

Tags: Dating, Men, Advice

The name of the game is waiting.

Err…I meant dating.

Fuck it. Same difference.

Anyone who says dating is not a game is lying. Everyone walks on eggshells around the opposite sex. There are unspoken rules what should and should not be revealed, and when. Women are at a disadvantage because what they (more…)

Cookie Dough-Oh-Oh

January 27, 2010

Tags: Ice Cream, Ben & Jerry's, Cookie Dough

I scream, you scream, we all scream for…the slump buster!

Yes, the dry spell is over! Wanna know who ended my fourteen months of sex-free misery?

Drum roll, please……………………………………………………………………

Ben & Jerry!

Seriously!

I wrote a really yummy post about it all…and at the last minute decided some things are more delicious when (more…)

Wake Up and Smell the...Cereal?

January 25, 2010

Tags: Adultery, Fire Writer, Dreams, Dating, Restaurants, Books, Insatiable, Grilled Cheese, Recipe, Wild Rice, Porridge, Breakfast, Cereal, Cherries, Walnuts, Nuts, Dried Fruit, Apples, Cream

I imagine you're chomping at the bit for my juicy news, readers...but sports-ignorant me didn't factor in the recent Vikings game. Narcissistic as I may be, I won't pretend to compete with football. That tasty tidbit must wait until my Minnesotan audience pulls their attention away from the boob tube.

In the meantime, (more…)

Makin' Bacon (Like You've Never Seen Before)

January 23, 2010

Tags: Sex Swing, Bacon, Brownies, Chocolate, Recipe, Dating

I've been waiting all week to share some really juicy news with you, but I simply couldn't place a heartfelt missive on the heels of the back-stabbing bitterness of the past few days. Consider this, a rewrite of my Bacon Brownie adventure from last fall, the buffer post.

Something even sweeter coming (again and (more…)

Read It & Eat

January 22, 2010

Tags: Fans, Facebook, Technology, Writing, Man Eater, Books, Meatless Man, Recipe, Macaroni and Cheese, Cheese, Panko, Casserole, Pasta, Vegetarian, Sausage

I don’t want to waste my words on haters, but apparently I pissed a couple people off with my last pair of posts. I regret sinking down to this level and spending a whole post on this High Schoolish bullshit, but I feel compelled to set the record straight.

I acknowledge that part (more…)








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Author's Note: Amount of chocolate consumed inversely proportionate to current amount of sexual activity. As you can see, I'm in the midst of a severe dry spell.











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