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Portland, Part Three: Uh-Oh VooDoo Baby

February 27, 2010

Tags: Travel, Portland, Slump Buster, Technology, VooDoo Doughnuts, Doughnuts, Frosting, Bakery, Contraception, Babies, Health, Pregnancy, Friends, TV, Television, Exercise, Candy, Breakups, Writing, Most Popular Posts

My second day in Portland marked Day 30 of my cycle. (I hope you don’t need a tutorial in female reproductive matters, readers. 30 days is late by almost any woman’s calendar.) Baby brain soon polluted my blissful vacation. Chubby cherubs were all over the place! When I flipped on the TV, the first (more…)

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The Perfect Hole, The Long John, and The Big O

February 8, 2010

Tags: Slump Buster, Puck, Recipe, Doughnuts, Breakfast, Pastries, Chocolate, Toffee, Candy

Man Eater has met her match.

Slump Buster not only broke the dry spell, he’s broken my orgasmic high score. I’ve had more Big O’s in 2010 than most women do during the entire span of their marriages. I don’t keep score, but if I did…I would’ve lost count (more…)

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Like what you see? Donate your dough to keep food on Man Eater's plate!

The Muchecinnahon Sandwich

Gluten-Free (but bery gluttonous) Pancakes!

They don't make 'em sweeter than singer/songwriter Grant Dawson!

Feed Me.

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Rock My World!

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Spanking with kitchen utensils makes chefs happy!

How many wierners could you fit in your mouth?

Psst...Man Eater Reveals Her Favorite Bedroom Trick!

Playboy Bunny Cake

So naughty, I won't even print the name of these cupcakes here. You've got to read the post!

Peter Sieve of Rogue Valley

Man Eater has a bun in the oven!

She & Him Ruined My Buns

The pefect bedtime snack: a MAM sandwich! Hold the mayo. ;-)

Kristoff Krane dishes it out for Man Eater!

Freaky P.O.T. Marshmallow Eggs

Casey Call: The cutest cook to ever appear in Man Eater's kitchen!

Diamond (Dogs) are a girl's best friend!

Grant Dawson serenades two smitten kittens!

Whore House Spaghetti

No Apologies Pizza

Hide the Salami Fougasse

Happy Accident Pepperoni Bread

Tying the knot...or not?

"Hide The Salami" Fougasse

I Already Forgot Ya Focaccia

Shrimp and Lobster Ravioli with Strawberry Salad

The sexiest hunk of beef Man Eater's ever had in her mouth!

Hot Bath. Hot Book. Dirty Thoughts. Clean Body.

Matthew Inkala with Original Artwork by Maria Athanasselis

Straight through the heart...

The pie that made Man Eater cry.

His & Hers Ice Cream Medication

Oh, baby(cake)!

Love You To (Reese's) Pieces Brownie Cupcakes

Oh, Snap! (Back to Reality) Rice Krispies Cupcakes

Kiss of Death Rice Krispies Bars

You'll never guess WTF is in this fudge!

OMG P.O.S. Chocolate Coffee Mascarpone Cake

The Beefcake Whose Frosting I'd Like To Taste...

As if Man Eater needed a how-to...

Who's to blame for these bruises?

Slump Buster's Secret Weapon!

Bed Rock Cupcake

Snap, Crackle, Pop the Question! Cupcakes

The sexiest six-pack to ever arrive on Man Eater's doorstep!

Bunny Love Cupcakes

Marie Antoinette Was Onto Something...

Sex and the City Cupcakes

We-Gotta-Talk Sweet Heart

Red Hot Popcorn

Miss Independent's Cupcake Cones

A souvenir from the sweetest Easter ever! Featured on Foodbuzz's Top 9!

Berry Me Coffee Cake: don't make your stomach settle for second best!

I Heart My Blackberry! Tart

"I hope this doesn't crumble" Blueberry Muffins

Ménage à Trois Mini Muffins

Love-Hate Cake

The Man Eater Cookie Sandwich (for him)

The Man Eater Cookie Sandwich (for her)

Pop My Cherry S'mores

The Perfect Hole

Bananas make muffins really moist!!!

Revenge should always be edible!

Stay for breakfast...and Cum Again? French Toast!

Booty Call Bars

Dissapointing Oat Balls

Tough Cookies (Man Eater Invented 'Em!)

Swallow your Banana Bliss Bread!

Man Eater's Moist Enchanted Muffins

Man Eater in her Mile High City hotel room. (Is that a post-coital glow?)

Pompous Pomme Frites--Chosen for the Top 9 on Foodbuzz!

Bed Me Bread

Man Eater's Sun Dried Tomato Feta Fougasse: Lucky #7 on Foodbuzz's TOP 9!

Man Eater's second French food phrase: Je'taime Baguette

Brioche: The only French food Man Eater has conquered

Black-and-Blue (Berry) Pancakes

Welcome Back! Blueberry Muffin Tops

"When Life Gives You Lemons" Mini Muffins

Second Chance Shortbread

Celebration Bars

The Velvet Elvis

Merry XXXmas Tart

Banana Split Pancakes are worth staying in bed for!

The latest addition to Man Eater's must-reads!

Oedipal Artichoke Dip

Eat Me I'm Irish Bread

Man Eater's Eggcellent International Sandwich

Sweet Potato Fries with Spicy Chipotle Mayo

Ryan Traster

Hot Sausage + Honey Buns = OMG

Drunken Pumpkin Bread

Happy Husbands 101: You can never have enough beer.

Who's Your Paddy? Bread Pudding

Sexy Dessert Pizza

Delicious Dilemma Bars

A Little Slice of Heaven

Six Inches of Bliss

Devil in a Red Dress Torte

Battle of the Bulge Napoleon

Pop My Cherry Trifle

Sleepover Panna Cotta: This could take all night!

He-Man Pancakes: fuel for a marathon fuck!

Man Eater is no pancake between the sheets, but she makes the berry best on the griddle.

Post-date Eggnog Pancake

Unspiked Eggnog Cheesecake

Untamed Cheesecake

Hop to it! Man Eater is hungry!

Mexican Wedding Cakes

It's all downhill from here, Birthday Girl!

Waiting by the phone is boring. Bake cookies instead!

Eat up! Puck N Speedy Pecan Pie goes fast!

WTF is the appeal of fudge?

An apple a day won't keep my Doc away!

With (Upside Down) Apple Pie like this, why am I still single?

He leaves crumbs; I make crumb cake. A coffee date is in order!

Makin' Bacon Brownie

Cowgirl The Fuck Up!

A sweet snack for your couch potato!

Stud Muffins: For macho men and the women who eat them

Dud Muffins: Looks can be deceiving!

Puppy Chow: for the hunky hound dog in your life.

Boston Cream Pie: Almost as delish as the bachelors of "Boston Legal"

What goes around comes around, especially when you're Dangling the Carrot Cake...

If only seduction was as fast and satisfying as these pumpkin cupcakes!

Have a slice of pound cake. Better yet, just pound me.

Cinnamon Rolls: Make sure to swallow.

Your banana belongs in my (bread) box.

Try a little Black Magic (Cake) on your lover.

How delicious are your (Marshmallow) Kisses?

Birthday Girls Don't Get Fat Cheesecake

Norwegian Birthday Cake: Simple, yet surprisingly satisfying.

Every time he says goodbye, I mend my broken heart with pie.

I can't make him love me, but I can make him love muffins.

Puck Me. Hard.

The (Almond Crusted Brie) Cheese Stands Alone

Hot sex (on a stick) here!

The Angry Chick Sandwich: Don't get mad--get eatin'!

F.U. BLT

Sexed Up Grilled Cheese Sandwich

I can't hold my tongue and chew food at the same time, but I can make a mean bowl of Shut Up And Eat It.

Men, cakes, and watermelon: I like 'em cut.

Sweetheart Scones: The edible equivalent of a platonic friend.

My eyes aren't usually this hue...

I offer private whoopie-making lessons (pies or otherwise)...

Author's Note: Amount of chocolate consumed inversely proportionate to current amount of sexual activity. As you can see, I'm in the midst of a severe dry spell.